Monday, February 23, 2015

Week 8 Recap: The One We Have All Been Waiting For

So... It's finally happened- they left the country!!!  But will Chris know how to fall in love outside of America??  One can only hope.  We are down to the last 3 amazing girls who are all so amazing and would make amazing wives.  In case you missed it, we have: Kaitlyn (totally awesome/funny but would hate life in Iowa, PLUS I've read rumors that she's doing this for TV exposure, so that's sad), Whitney (so positive and annoying I could puke), and Becca (probably the best choice for him, super boring and virginal).  Can't wait to see which lucky ladies make it through the episode, and what happens in that fantasy suite... ;)

If he only knew...
We start off the trip with a date with Kaitlyn, visiting a temple and hopefully getting Kaitlyn to get out of her comfort zone!  Later they play around with some monkeys who go after what they want (bananas) and Kaitlyn realizes she needs to learn from those monkeys and go get it (Chris)!  She is ready for some serious conversations and some serious fantasy time.  At dinner, Kaitlyn opens up about her guard and says she is going to let it down (but really, why do Bach contestants ALWAYS have to talk about guards being up?  So cliche.).  After Kaitlyn opens up, Chris is super excited to be with her allllll night and we're like, look how hot she is!  Of course you're excited!  They head off to their baller fantasy suite where we watch them make out some more, and Kaitlyn admits that she is falling in love with him, and in a bold move- Chris tells her that he is falling in love too!!  And I'm like, uhh I'm pretty sure they are not allowed to admit that at this point... but okay.  Now that they know about their strong feelings, they pull down those shades and continue their night in private... Ohhh yeah.

Chris's next date involves Whitney and a boat, and I'm like, you are going to be trapped in the middle of the ocean all day with Whitney?!?  I can't imagine anything more awful.  But I guess this is the first test- if he can survive a day of isolation with her, what's the rest of his life in Iowa?  Whitney is sure that she needs to talk on and on and on about her sister and explain all about why her sister was being such a brat (aka realistic) when they met.  Things were only 99% perfect because of her stupid sister!  I want everything to be 100% amazing all the time, and it wasn't, all because of her!  Is Chris starting to realize how freaking annoying she? It's hard to tell if he is figuring things out or not...  Apparently his only reservation is if she is willing to uproot her life for Iowa (I mean, she did make a huge deal about how much she loves her job...), but I'm like, is that really your only concern? Yikes.  Chris very clearly explains that his town freaking sucks and there is nothing to do, and that she wouldn't be able to work.  But Whitney reassures Chris that she would have no problem leaving her job and all she really wants to do in life is get married and have babies, so.  Screw a social life!  Screw a career!  Let's start making babies!  No really, like, tonight, in the fantasy suite.  I'm still waiting on that specimen... ;)


Finally, the date that ABC has been telling us we have all been waiting for! The virgin.  The fantasy suite. What shocking events will ensue??? They start off their date going on a little adventure walk, just like the new adventure they'll be going on later, perhaps...?  They go to this fortune teller guru guy who gives them advice for the night, to make love.  Chris of course is like, yeahhhh I like that, yeahhhh and Becca has an "oh shit" moment when she realizes that Chris is like every other man and possibly won't be too ecstatic about her choices... Chris voices his concern to us that Becca has never been in love before, because that's a red flag.  Little does he know what else she's never done before...  They both share that they think they are falling in love with the other, and things are getting pretty serious.  So when will she reveal the big news?!? The fantasy suite card arrives, and apparently Becca still hasn't figured out what she is going to do!  Really, you've had the entire season to think about this.  Just tell him.  Becca tells Chris that she wants to spend that time together, and so agrees to join him in the suite.  Chris is looking forward to this "big night," to get to know Becca on an intimate level, because HE STILL DOESN'T KNOW!!!  Finally, once they are IN THE SUITE, Becca is ready to drop the news.  She tells him, and Chris goes totally silent and cannot speak for a good 20 seconds.  His eyes just completely drop all the hope that was there, and eventually he finally tells her that he respects that.  And Becca could not be happier about that reaction- it was perfect!  Really?  Because I'm pretty sure that was not all that supportive...  Regardless, they spend the night together, and Becca leaves us with a shady statement about how long she has been waiting to feel this way... What is she implying???  Is she going to let Chris take her v-card???  Will Chris then feel guilty for life if he doesn't giver her a rose this week???  We are dying to know!!!

Well, apparently Chris and Becca had a very serious conversation off camera during their fantasy suite date, and Chris has woken up feeling very confused and very scared about his decision.  He starts crying as he babbles on about his tough decision, and keeps freaking out that he has no clarity here.  Thankfully, Chris Harrison is here to make everything better!  Chris tells Chris H. that he is feeling really strong about one girl, and I have to assume that is Whitney.  Ughhh how can he stand it?  Hope he can finally make up his mind about the other...

The rose ceremony begins, and Chris Harrison reminds us that this is sacred ground, which means NO signs of affection other than holding hands.  Respect, okay!  The girls are all there dressed up in their little Balinese (is that a word?) outfits, and Becca is feeling very worried about her status with Chris, as he has an excruciating decision to make.  Before he gives away any roses, he pulls Becca aside for a little chat.  So, apparently Chris was questioning if Becca was just having feelings for him because of the show, but Becca wants to reassure him that it is not the show, it is honest feelings!  She has not taken Arlington off the table and she wants to be able to talk about it more.  Meanwhile, Kaitlyn is super excited because she assumes that Becca is being sent home, so when they see Chris and Becca hand-in-hand returning to the rose ceremony, there's a big "oh shit" moment.  Well this changes things...

Ninja Chris gets back to his position and gets ready to hand out the first rose.  And, duh, it goes to Whitney.  Yay I am so happy this is amazing this is the greatest thing that has ever happened in my life we are perfect for each other!!! Then Chris gives the other rose to... Becca.  Wow.  I guess you decided to take a chance on her after all.  Poor Kaitlyn is looking pretty pissed and a bit shocked, and I get it.  She let her guard down!  Clearly it wasn't enough, and I am bummed because I like Kaitlyn, BUT, I never saw her as his wife.  Chris whispers some B.S. to her about how hard this has been and how it makes no sense and he has to follow his gut and blah blah blah, and I'm over it already.  Did he mention that this has been excruciating?  No, what's excruciating is listening to this horrifically awkward goodbye.  Just put her in the van and let her go, I can't bear to watch this anymore.  They both cry a bit more, and we see Whitney and Becca get a little more confident.

So in the end, it comes down to the super annoying vs. the super boring.  You can't lose, Chris!  But first, we get Women Tell All next week, where I am sure the drama will escalate even further.  Can't wait to get all the dish from the eliminated ladies!  Until then...

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