Monday, August 1, 2016

The Bachelorette Finale: The Most Dramatic One Yet?

Tonight is THE event we have all been waiting for! The most dramatic season finale EVER is upon us. This of course is another 3-hour production, so let me run through the highlights...

The guys are meeting JoJo's family, and who could forget those brothers, and that mom.... She looks just as much of a hot mess now as she did last season. Get that mama some wine! The family is very protective of course, and mama is very worried that Jordan is TOO awesome and fun, so it won't work out. Prediction: they family will prefer Robby, but JoJo will prefer Jordan, and she will do what she wants. We'll see if I'm right!

So apparently, Jordan is not really "marriage material," and didn't ask JoJo's dad for permission to propose. (WHAT?!?) On the other hand, Robby is totally marriage material and asked both the parents about proposing. So... The family clearly wants it to be Robby and JoJo clearly wants it to be Jordan, shock. JoJo is completely torn now, and has no idea what her heart wants. This never happens on this show, what a surprise!

JoJo also has a final date with both Robby and Jordan, and she needs to decide which one she loves more. I just feel like there is some problem with both of them. Robby seems great and says all the right things about their future together and how much he loves her, but we can't help but think about the ex girlfriend he left to be on the show (allegedly). Something about him just seems a bit insincere... Meanwhile Jordan also seems perfect, but is he TOO perfect, and how is it going to be fitting into his semi-famous life...? (Side note: This is why she should have just chosen Chase...........)

So. Robby is 100% clear about how he wants to propose to JoJo, and Jordan seems to be fumbling around his words about why he didn't ask for permission. So, things are not looking good for Jordan here... If he never talks to her parents about it, and she can't be sure there is a proposal coming, she probably won't want to pick him.... So. Good news for Robby right now I guess. JoJo just cannot get over the fact that Jordan didn't ask her dad's permission. And I'm like.. is her family not still in town...? Can he not just go over to their place and ask them tomorrow? Or like, call him at least? I feel like this is not a situation that can't be fixed. Also, JoJo is being SUPER pushy in making the guys straight up tell her, I AM going to propose in 2 days. So much for a surprise ending. Is forcing them to propose to you on a TV show's timeline really the best thing for your relationship? I just don't know...

Okay I guess all my predictions are coming true tonight because Jordan goes ahead and calls the parents to ask about proposing to JoJo. And they excitedly say yes of course. Hopefully the parents will let JoJo know what happened before she totally blows him off because of this drama! In other news, both guys do pick out rings, and I definitely like Jordan's ring over Robby's ring. Yeah, I am still pro-Jordan........ But it does look like both guys are intending on proposing, and JoJo is still a bit torn as she reads heartfelt letters from both of them just hours before the final rose ceremony. She clearly wants it to be Jordan but feels bad eliminating a great guy like Robby. We get it. He'll be fine. Maybe his ex girlfriend will give him a second chance now that he's famous...

So much this.

JoJo heads to the final rose ceremony and- surprise, surprise- Robby is the first guy to arrive. And he is SO effing confident. YIKES. This will be painful. JoJo, like a JERK, lets Robby talk first and doesn't stop him until like 5 minutes into his profession of love. And he is just going on and on as I am screaming NO GOD NO PLEASE STOP at the television. FINALLY JoJo stops him before he gets down on one knee and explains that she does love him, but there is somehow something missing. She wanted it to be him so badly, but it's just not. Robby is actually super classy and just says that he wants her to be happy. And we have to wonder- is he emotionless because he is shocked, or because this whole thing was a scam from the beginning so he's actually not that torn up about it. Meanwhile, JoJo is torn UP, and let's just hope she has a makeup artist on standby to fix her up before the actual proposal... because, yikes. Robby is finally able to muster up some tears in the car ride home, but he still just seems somehow.. insincere in his sadness. Very curious...

So at the end of the day, Jordan proposes and JoJo accepts, and they both go on and on about how much they love each other. And I am very much reminded of Andi and Josh... it feels oddly similar. So. I'll give this one about a 40% chance of making it... And all I can think about is, does Aaron even KNOW that his brother is ENGAGED?? Or did he find out with the rest of America??? I need to know all about this drama!

Per usual, we have another hour of BS to get through, and hopefully we will actually get some new information. We first have to hear Robby spew a bunch of bullshit, and I honestly still don't believe him fully. It sounds like he is very strategically answering questions to make himself sound good. I don't know, maybe I'm being overly suspicious. In other news, we hear about how JoJo and Jordan are getting a lot of hate in the media, and that people are making JoJo feel really bad about her love for him, and it's kind of sad. I mean, I agree it probably won't work out, but let them enjoy at least a little bit of happiness. Luckily their love is so strong that they've gotten through it... In further news, we get absolutely no new information about the Rodgers family drama, and even though Chris Harrison really tries to pry and get some details, Jordan pretty skillfully deflects all questioning. I guess I'll just have to rely on the internet for all the updates on that.

At the end of the day, we don't yet know who the next Bachelor will be (likely Luke, but I am hoping for Chase!!). But we DO know that an AMAZING season of Bachelor in Paradise begins tomorrow- the most wonderful time of the year. I cannot WAIT to see what insanity ensues, and I recommend it to EVERYONE. You'll thank me, I promise. 

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