Week 3 Recap: It's not called 'Let's Make Friends'

Tonight there are 16 men still vying for Des' heart.  I can't wait to see the drama that will inevitably ensue tonight- hopefully we will find out what the big problem is with Ben, and of course whose girlfriend shows up!  The first date of the night is a group date and oh no, BEN is on the date.  Ugh, how horrible for the other guys.  Please.  Des is SO excited because the guys will be playing... Dodgeball!  Yeah!  Men!  This should get intense.

I could watch this forever... (ABC)

Des is excited to see the guys in their "natural state," aka hot sweaty men physically competing for her.  In case you were wondering, yes, that is every girl's dream.  Just when it looks like the whole date will consist of the pro team kicking the guys' asses, Chris Harrison shows up to explain the real competition- red team vs. blue team for extra time with Des!  Chris has created the teams by himself, and I am hoping he just stacks one team against the other.  That makes it more fun!  Not only are the guys competing, but they are competing in tight shorts in front of a hug crowd.  LOVE.  Des is literally dying laughing, and what I wouldn't give to be in her place.  Ahh, boys.  I decide to root for the blue team, since I love Drew and I do like Ben!  They win the intense first game, but the red team takes the second game- all tied up!  So much suspense!  This is for all the marbles.  Or as (who?) explains, marbles in this case would be time with Des tonight.  Ohhh, I wasn't sure what you meant by marbles, thanks for that explanation, guy who matters so little that I don't remember your name.  Well the third game starts and right away Brooks falls the to the ground.  I swear it looks like he is grabbing his balls, but apparently it is his finger.  Des just wants to help him feel better- his poor broken finger!  He is shipped off the to hospital and the game resumes, and YAY blue team wins!  Zak is able to take down Chris at the end, and Des is so impressed!  She decides, why not take all the guys to the after party!? That was NOT the point, Des. Whatever, on to the rest of the date...

Meanwhile at the hospital, Brooks is all hooked up to a million wires and machines- all for a finger?  I mean, I've never broken a finger, but this seems excessive.  Des has a hard time keeping her mind off of Brooks (they ARE perfect for each other), but then she sees 9 other hotties around her and quickly moves on.  One of the guys whose name I also can't remember (Brad?) confesses to Des that he has a son and Des just eats that up. She loves kids!  As the night goes on, Des spends time with each of the guys, and they are panicking about the rose per usual. Chris surprises Des by finding a "special spot" on the roof!  How did he find this place?!?  Because it's a roof.  Every building has one.  They have a romantic chat and Chris is feeling confident with her.  Phew. I like him enough, I guess he's fine.  Finally, Brooks makes a miraculous recovery and shows up at the date in his uniform and splinted finger.  Des is smitten and they have a little make out sesh in the middle of the group date.  Love it.  Even though Brooks went through SO much to be with her, Chris gets the rose and extra bonus time with Des (private concert!).  The other guys watch them dancing/kissing and get even more jealous.  I guess I like Chris- he seems very nice and normal, which is always a plus for this show. 

Kasey gets the one-on-one date card, and I am SO excited to hear what hashtags he comes up with for the date!  But before the date, Des gets a sketchy call from Chris Harrison.  He has some bizarre news.  Uh oh!  Des is ready to head to the house to confront one of these bastards.  Someone here is being rude and playing a game.  NOT okay.  Well, it's Brian.  Do we even know him that well?  Des asks him if there is anything he needs to tell her, and if he is here for the right reasons.  And he just LIES about it.  Well, in comes Chris Harrison with some woman, aka Brian's girlfriend! Oh snap!  Well Stephanie breaks down and starts going ballistic, and it turns out that he has been lying to her the whole time.  AND she has a son who Brian is a role model for.  Holyyyyy moly.  Des and Chris try to mediate this situation, and this guy is clearly just a douche.  They slept together 2 days before he came on the show!  Stephanie is just trying to help Des and expose him as a jerk, and I'm like, okay okay, just send him home and let them work this out on their own.  Chris asks Des if there is ANY chance he is staying on the show, and Des says not a chance.  Don't worry, none of us were rooting for him anyway.  Moving on.  Brian is escorted out, and the guys all try to act like they weren't eavesdropping on the whole thing.  Don't worry, Chris explains the whole thing in case they didn't figure it out on their own.  Des gives them all the chance to admit anything they need to tell her, but nobody speaks up, and hopefully that means they are all good guys!  This situation does bring Brandon to tears thinking about this poor single mother who Brian left, and I cannot handle this emotion.  Brandon, get yourself together.  You are nuts.

Finally we get to Kasey's date, and hopefully Des will be able to focus on him!  They go out to explore Hollywood, and they are ready for some fun!  They come across some people dancing on the side of a building, and they are going to try it too!  This should be interesting.  They start having a great time, but finally reach the point of exhaustion.  They actually go to have a "normal" date on top of the building, and all of the sudden these intense winds start blowing.  They decide to jump into the pool to avoid the wind, and apparently that is freezing too.  This date.  Such a disaster.  They end up inside in a stairwell, and Des does give Kasey the rose. I think she was just trying to end that date once and for all. What a bummer!  I love Kasey but this date was a bust.  #fail

Oh and I could watch this forever too... (ABC)

The final date card is for another group date- this time there are only 5 of them, so it should be a little more intimate.  This date involves some acting/fake fighting/stunts, and I can't wait to see more guys getting physical!  Get ready for boot camp!  The guys get all dressed up in cowboy gear, and Des is loving it.  The guys get the chance to try out some cowboy skills and ride some horses to fight to become the Lone Ranger.  Juan Pablo does all his lines in Spanish (SEXY!), and Des is clearly keeping him around based on his hot hot hotness.  She chooses him for her Lone Ranger, and they get extra time together to preview The Lone Ranger (plug from ABC, anyone?).  Des is distracted by him, and I mean, who wouldn't be?  He screams sex and even though they have no future, she should definitely keep him around for some fun in the fantasy suite, if you know what I mean...


Later, Des realizes there are 4 other guys waiting for her, and she spends some more time with each of them.  I still love love love Bryden, even if he is a little reserved and shy to make the moves, they definitely have a connection and I want him to stick around for sure.  Zak also makes a connection with her tonight, and I do not know how she will narrow this down.  There are so many good guys that make her laugh!  James shows his loving/caring side, and Des is eating it up.  In fact, she gives him the rose because he opened up so much and she needs to reassure him that she wants him around.  You gotta play the insecure card every once and awhile!  And the other guys are devastated.

Instead of a cocktail party this week, Des decides to invite the guys to a daytime pool party.  Oh, did she just want to see everyone shirtless?? Amazing plan.  America thanks you, Des.  But before the party even starts, Ben whisks her away on a car ride for a little extra time.  This is a great strategy, but the guys see it as a "character flaw."  Okay, you are clearly all just jealous.  What angers them most is that he lies and tells them he didn't have any time with her yet.  How dare he lie to the other guys!  Please.  Thank you Ben for realizing "It's not called 'Let's Make Friends'."  Anyway, Brandon gets the chance to talk to Des about his emotional breakdown the other day, and essentially tells her he wants to "guard and protect her heart" a la Ali's Kasey, and I cannot deal with him. Too much too soon!

It's time for the rose ceremony, and I really hope she sends home the guys whose names I can't even remember.  And Brandon.  To my surprise, she keeps some randos around, and some not so-hotties, and I am over it.  The final rose of the night goes to Ben (shock!), and poor Brandon gets sent home.  After he told her he was falling in love with her?!  He is literally going to kill himself, and I am kind of scared for his life.  He tells her she is making a mistake and walks away, and Des goes after him to explain that she just isn't feeling it, and it needed to be sooner than later.  Agreed!  Get your shit together!  He can't even cry- he is out of tears.  Dear God.  Dan is also sent home, not a big deal since we didn't really know him. 

It looks like next week will bring more Ben drama, and apparently Bryden is going to be the one to bring it up- Nooooo!  That never ends well!  Hopefully Bryden won't shoot himself in the foot, and we will see what Des thinks about the whole thing.  Stay tuned for all the action!

Week 2 Recap: Watch Them Superman That Ho

Tonight is the first night of dates on The Bachelorette!  I cannot wait to see who she picks, who cries, and who makes a fool of himself.  I have a feeling the drama is already getting started!  The first date of the night is a one-on-one, and Chris Harrison explains to the men what that means, since clearly we don't know how the show works.  For the first date with Des, she chooses... in my opinion the ugliest guy in the house... Brooks.  Ugh. Maybe it's the long hair, but I am not feeling it.  Des is so excited and feels like a princess of course!  The other guys are so jealous and I am like geez guys, act more girly.  Oh well, let's see what Des has planned...

The more I look at Brooks, the less I dislike him.  I feel like with a good haircut, he could actually be pretty smokin.  Des takes him to a wedding dress boutique since it is what she loves, and they are just ready for the big day!  Brooks has to pretend he is having a good time watching her try on dresses, but once they get out and about and hit up the cupcake truck, people swarm them and they are both loving it.  They then take a drive up a mountain- still in the wedding dress/tux by the way (did she have to pay for that?  Because she is about to trash that dress), and they end up at the Hollywood sign! Jealous.  She tells him how most people don't get to do this, but luckily ABC hooked her up!  No of course she has a different explanation.  They have a romantic date on the Hollywood sign, and it is so symbolic of sitting on the top of the world!  Why does literally everything they do on these shows have to be symbolic of something?  Why can't it just be a cool experience?  Brooks shows off his sensitive and romantic side, and I guess I like him... he actually is pretty perfect for Des- they both love love!  They kiss on top of the sign- super cute- and okay I think he will go pretty far. Just please cut the hair!!!  Later, after they have changed back into normal clothes, Des drives them up to a closed road and omg- she suggests that they move the signs and drive onto the bridge anyway!  Oh no, what will happen!?  A dinner for 2 on a closed bridge. I have definitely seen this on a Bachelor (maybe Bachelor Pad) episode before- think of something new, please.  They have a serious talk about their parents and things get emotional- they are connecting on such a deep level!  p.s. Is it just me, or does Des look like she is going to cry 100% of the time?  Why are her eyes so watery?  Anyway, he gets the rose and I feel like this is actually the perfect guy for her. The end.  And wait, just when you think the date is over, it keeps going with a private concert by Andy Grammer. WTF Bachelorette, please save SOMETHING for the other guys!  This is getting insane.

Meanwhile, back at the house, the 2nd date card arrives and we remember that there are still 18 guys waiting for dates.  Oh, them.  The group date is going to be at a winery/mansion (jealous) and there are 14 of them for Des to "juggle."  Today they get to star in their own rap video!  Oh lord. She brings out Soulja Boy, and I have flashbacks to my 4th year of college.  The guys are all going to Superman that Ho!  But really, this is going to be atrocious, and I cannot wait.  They all try out some rhymes and some dance moves, and Soulja Boy picks his favorites to star with him, while the rest dance.  We soon discover that the lyrics all have to do with past contestants who weren't there "for the right reasons," and I cannot wait to see this.  Guarding and protecting her heart? YES.  Brandon gets to act as Kasey (from Ali's season, for those who don't know) and "jiggle his junk" in Des's face.  The scene takes forever, Brandon's butt keeps hanging out, and Des looks super uncomfortable.  Overall this is the worst video ever made, and I feel like Soulja Boy needs to reevaluate his life after being a part of that shitshow. Embarrassing. 

Please no more. (ABC)

Finally the awkwardness is over and I can climb back out from under my blanket.  Des is excited to talk to all the "marriage-material" guys.  First, we get to see Zak W. (shirtless guy) have a real heart and emotions, and Des loves the thoughtful antique journal he gives her.  Is she a writer?  Like is there a symbol there? (You know everything needs to be symbolic!).  Next, we see Ben swooping in to take Des away, and all the guys are already claiming that he is NOT here for the right reasons.  But wait, he just performed a rap that proved that he IS. What am I supposed to think?!?  I still really like Ben, and he hasn't done anything yet to anger me-  the guys are just jealous!  In other news, Brandon is already starting to get super clingy and weird, and I am over him already.  I think it was appropriate that he played Kasey's part in the rap, because he is becoming just like him.  He's obsessing over her and definitely trying too hard and opening up way too fast, and I sense that Des is overwhelmed and not feeling it, but she's too nice and always finds the good in everything. No. This is too much!  At the end of the night, Ben gets the rose, and the guys are freaking.  I still don't get what the problem is, but I guess it will all come out eventually?

Bryden gets the last date of the night, and I am excited to get to know him better, since he was one of my top choices last week.  Des has planned a road trip in her Bentley, and thank goodness because they both love road trips!  How do you have a road trip, you may ask?  All you need is a car, some gas, and great company!  Thanks, Des.  Des explains everything there is to know about California, which of course is symbolic for her whole life!  She loves that he knows nothing about the world outside of Montana (and Iraq, I guess), and they have such a lovely time exploring.  Des, this is not even close to Brooks' date.  What the heck. Clearly ABC did not deem Bryden worthy of the same treatment.  Des feels like a kid again when she is with him, but I feel like he is going to have trouble opening up emotionally. He does go into detail about a big car accident he was in, and even brought pictures to share.  This guy has been through a ridiculous amount of rough stuff, and I like him, but I do still feel like he is going to have a hard time being as emotionally open as she wants/needs.  I just don't see the spark that I see with Brooks and Ben.  He does get the rose, and he also gets some hot tub time with Des, where we have the most uncomfortable "is he gonna kiss her??" moment of our lives.  As I am screaming at the TV covering my face, Des finally tells him to just kiss her already, and pounces on him.  Thank god someone did it.  SO awkward I almost died.  So happy that is over.

Finally it is time for the cocktail party and rose ceremony.  There are a bunch of guys I don't even remember, so I guess we should spend some time with them, right?  This rando Michael G. (okay, HE is the ugliest in the house) shares his story about having diabetes (is that really the best way to win her heart?), but Ben steals her away again!  But he already HAS a rose!  This guy.  Okay, maybe he is starting to show that he is full of it, but maybe the other guys should learn how this show works!  Instead of bitching about it like a bunch of girls, maybe they should do something for themselves!  Just saying.  A bunch of the guys confront Ben, because they know that he just doesn't get it, and he's being a liar.  Apparently he never talks about his son, only about his businesses, and they need Des to see the truth!  This confrontation is getting ridiculous- just grow some balls and move on.

Des is ready for the rose ceremony, and I feel like she is just too nice to send people home.  But here we go... A bunch of guys I don't even remember get roses, and I wish she would narrow it down faster.  Brandon gets the final rose- good thing too, or he may have killed himself right then and there.  Looks like she is sending home 3 guys- Will the high-fiver, Robert who is super cute by the way, and Nick M. who I don't remember in the slightest.  See ya!  Down to 16 guys, and guess what?  More confrontations with Ben next week!  Oh, and that whole girlfriend drama will come out.  Can't wait!

P.S. If you want to watch the worst video of your life, check out the guys' Soulja Boy music video and try to keep your eyes open for the whole thing. Oh and by the way, looks like they cut out Brandon's part.. too inappropriate?

Week 1 Recap: #fantasysuitefail

It's finally time for The Bachelorette, and I am sure this season will be drama-filled and overall amazing.  Previews show that these men are going to be even bitchier than the women on The Bachelor, and I love it.  Hot men getting all fired up!?  Fist fights?! This will definitely be one to watch. 

We first see Des in Malibu, CA, and it is just like a fairy tale!  During this season, she gets to live in an incredible mansion, and this is just proof that if you work hard (or... whore yourself out on tv), you can really move up in the world!  She grew up poor, but now she can live lavishly and that's what matters, right??  Well we get to relive the harsh night of rejection on Sean's season, and all those devastating emotions come back. Oh Des, you know you're going to have to do that to all (or almost all) of these guys, right?  Back to Malibu, we find out that not only does Des get this insane house to herself (why does she need that whole pool for just her?), but she also gets to drive some sick car (a Bentley?) around town.  The perks of being the Bachelorette just keep getting greater and greater!  Then again, she also has to roller skate down a boardwalk alone in a bikini top and look super uncomfortable, so I'm not sure it's worth it...  Regardless, Des is "ready to put a ring on it," so let's get to the GUYS!

Des wants a "man," not a boy, so it is time to weed them out.  But before we do, Des has to turn on the waterworks yet again. We get it, you love love and you want to find your prince.  Now get out there and meet the hotties!

Des and BFF Chris Harrison are ready for this fairy tale! (ABC)

Bryden is first to be introduced- he is an Iraq war veteran, which makes me love him so much, of course.  Plus he lives out West, plus he has a dog that he loves.  I think he will have something wrong mentally/emotionally that will keep him and Des apart, but I still love him!  Next comes Will, who is fun but I feel will come on a little too strong... yeah.  Please don't high five every stranger you meet.  Drew is super cute, and of course has a depressing life story that will help him have an emotional connection with Des. Enough sob stories, you are hot.  Nick R. is a total douche and oh by the way, a professional magician.  NOPE.  Next.  Zak apparently loves hanging out in the nude, which is fine by me!  But Des will not be into that, in my opinion.  Next comes Robert who apparently invented "sign spinning."  Is that something you can invent?  Good thing you are hot and have a cute dog (with one eye that you probably rescued), because you are a nerd.  But in an adorable way, and I think Des will love it.  Mike the dental student is from a British family, but lacks an accent, and at least he realizes that he would be hotter with an accent.  Way to go, Mike.  Get that accent back please.  Brandon the adrenaline junky is like my worst nightmare, as he loves being outside all day long.  Kill me.  Maybe Des will like that?  He too has a sob story about his loser parents, and I am sure Des will connect to his rough childhood and keep him around for a while.

The men are finally headed to the house, and Des is so excited!  She does look beautiful, and mentions one more time about her fairy tale coming true.  We get it.  Drew is first out, and he looks super hot, and is also nervous and adorable. Yes, please!  Next out is Brooks, who has long hair and horse teeth, and is nervous in a not-cute way.  No thanks.  Brad from Denver is next, and he brings a wishbone for the 2 of them.  Cute!  Keep him.  Bryden the war vet is up, and they seem to make a decent connection.  Next is Michael G., who takes Des for a walk to the fountain to dig out her penny. Okay, that's cute.  But he's not my type... The next limo brings Kasey who admits that he stalked her on social media and gives her some hashtags- I guess that's sweet?  Will is next, who decides to nickname her Athena, which is nice?  But kind of weird and too much for a first meeting I feel.  Next up is Mikey, who brings up her older brother... uhhhh too soon. You blew it with that.  Jonathan is next, and at first glance he is adorable, but he gives her a note that could be cute, but instead has a key to the "fantasy suite."  Okay, YOU blew it.  She's not that kind of girl!  Yikes.  A shirtless Zak emerges from the limo next (remember, he loves to be naked!).  He asks her to accept his abs, and everyone woman in America says YES.  James is next out of the limo, and you can tell immediately she is NOT feeling it.  He seems awkward and odd and is not very attractive. Goodbye.  What's with all these unattractive weirdos??  Larry is next and he tries to dance with her, but when she gets twisted up in her dress, things get weird.  The magician is up, and does a magic trick, ugh, and we all throw up.  The other Zack comes out, is kind of cute, but not her type, I think.  And then, the knight in shining armor emerges. Diogo is here just like a fairy tale!  Not sure he speaks English, and he is NOT cute, and I'm like, what are the producers doing?!?  Meanwhile, the guys in the house are NOT okay with all these crazies, and I'm like, guys, you have no idea what is to come on this show.

Is that all 25 yet?  I always forget how overwhelming the first night is.  Ugh, apparently we still have 10 more to go.  Next limo.  Chris is hot, plus he joke almost proposes to her, which I love.  Mike the "British" guido dental student appears in his lab coat, acting like he is a real doctor.  Okay.  Robert is super hot yet again, and I'm wondering why he didn't come out spinning a sign?!  Next up is Juan Pablo who is super good looking, but doesn't seem to speak English too well?  Or maybe Des just can't speak Spanish. Not sure about this one, but she'll keep him because he is super sexy.  Next, Brandon arrives on a motorcycle. Hot. She is digging that for sure.  The final limo arrives and we get Brian who wanted to look casual tonight, um, no thanks.  Then Micah, who is wearing...? Something? I guess he designed his outfit himself? Funny...  The other Nick arrives and shares a lovely little poem he wrote by himself.  How sweet.  He's cute, I approve.  Dan emerges next, and he is hot but possibly gay?  Finally, an adorable little child comes out of the limo.  Oh, Ben.  This is the BEST card to play.  His precious son. They are matching and are both so flippin' cute I can't handle it.  I love this guy, just hope she can handle that he has a kid.  Phew, we are done!  Am I the only one who is overwhelmed?  Let's get to the cocktail party.

Chris lets Des know that she can pull a Sean and give away roses whenever she wants.  Ugh, that is annoying.  Can we go back to the old way please?  Sean ruined everything. But I kind of wish she would just give out the roses right away- I know exactly which 6 I would send home right now... There's a couple weirdos in there for sure.  Speaking of which, the magician decides to perform an illusion by making Des disappear for 5 minutes.  Funny.  Brandon swoops in real quick and steals her away and the guys are already starting to get pissy and jealous!  He is super sweet and sentimental and I like him.  After talking to a lot of the guys, she still hasn't passed out any roses and the guys are freaking about it.  Why isn't she being liberal with the roses like Sean?!?  Thank goodness.  Des spends some time with Ben, the dad, and they have a great connection, and he gets a rose!  So exciting. The other men, of course, freak.  They are more petty than the women!  The competition is heating up... wait, isn't this about finding love, not winning?

Des loves how hard the guys are trying to get her attention, and shirtless Zak decides the best way to do that is to strip down even further and jump in the pool.  #streaking!  Poor Zak, as he is still in the pool, someone steals Des away, but she feels so bad that he was so pathetic in jumping into the pool, that she gives him a rose.  He earned it, I guess?  Bryden the army guy gets some good time with her, and gets a rose, but I am wondering how he has so much leave saved up that he can be here if he is still in the military??  My husband doesn't get that kind of leave!  Next, Des talks to Juan Pablo, and by that I mean she just drools at his gorgeous looks and soccer skills.  Is soccer what determines a happy future together? I guess so.  Later, Drew gets a rose- cute!  So far I am happy with most of her choices.  And now Jonathan.  Ohhhh my.  He decides to make his fantasy suite to lure her in, trying to get a kiss on the mouth, and even the other guys know this is creepy.  He tells Des that he has no filter, which makes him better than her last boyfriend, Sean.  This guy is too much and Des is clearly uncomfortable.  Apparently his "love tank" is about to explode, and Des is not okay with him and this whole fantasy suite thing.  #fantasysuitefail (Kasey is cracking me up).  Des finally can't take it anymore and sends him home on the spot- hopefully he will go find someone and get laid real quick.  He needs it.

Finally we are on to the rose ceremony, and we can only hope she gets rid of the uglies and lame-os.  She picks some good ones, but then Brooks gets a rose, ew, and Juan Pablo (shock!) even though I don't think they exchanged 3 words.  Kasey gets a rose- #winning and as it nears the end, the guys are looking nervous!  It looks like she's only keeping the hotties, which is a good strategy of course, and we are not sad to see the weirdos go.  Goodbye knight, dental student guido, and creeper Larry.  Though I am scared that Larry will go make a voodoo doll of Des to dance with and then come back and kill someone.  Thankfully the magician goes home as well, and we are all hoping that he will rethink his life choices now... 

Well, we have our top 19!  There are definitely some good ones in there, and so far I think my top choices are Ben, Drew, Bryden, and Robert.  But we'll see what happens once things heat up and we get to know them a little better... Well, it appears that shit is going to get real this season, and it looks like just about everyone is going to cry on camera at some point or another.  It seems that Des's "fairy tale" will have some bumps in the road- girlfriend scandals, betrayals, fist fights, but of course some love!  Unfortunately it looks like Ben is going to turn out to be a jerk (boo) as will James (who?), but you know how the producers love to spin this stuff!  So stay tuned to find out which hotties stick around, and whose abs we get to see next week! 

DWTS Week 8: It's Hard Being So Caucasian!

Well, I predicted Sean may be eliminated last week, and I admit I was wrong. Luckily the right thing happened and Andy Dick finally went home instead.  But this week will definitely be between Sean and Ingo, so it will be a close one!

Tonight, Sean is looking dapper in his tuxedo- I feel like we are back on the Bachelor! He and Peta will be performing the Tango first tonight and I am excited for some sensuality!  Sean tells us that he loves this and wants to "last as long as I can last" and I know we all feel the same way ;) (especially Catherine!). 

Just barely survived last week... we'll see about this week!  (ABC)

His dance begins as a wedding gone wrong and we all hope this is just an act!  Unfortunately, he looks very unsure this week and is not appearing very confident in this dance.  Not his best.  He seems to be concentrating on the steps way too much and doesn't seem to be having fun... But Catherine loves it of course!  Bruno critiques that he may have lost his footwork and Carrie Ann agrees that he has lost the music.  The crowd boos, but the judges are correct!  Len says it was a little bit ugly, yikes!  Well hopefully the second dance will be better!  Brooke asks how he would feel about doing hip hop next week, and Sean says playfully that when you look at him, you think hip hop- OH yes. PLEASE tweet to vote for Sean to do hip hop.  I will DIE.  Anyway, he gets a 21 on the first dance, so I am not sure there will even be a next week...

The second dance of the night is a menage-er- I mean- a "trio" dance.  Sean loves the thought of dancing with 2 women at once, and I'm like... really, Sean?  They are bringing Sharna into the dance and things are gonna get craaaaazy.  Sean is acting as a magician with the ladies as his assistants, so this should be interesting. The dance is better than the last and he actually looks pretty happy and much more confident this time around.  His feet still aren't the best, but he looked like he was having a lot more fun at least!  The judges are proud of him for trying, but they still don't think it was too great.  This is not looking good, Sean!  Sean admits that these dances were hard for him, being so Caucasian, and we have to agree.  He gets another 21 (consistent!), and he needs some votes!!

This week was rough- I think this might be the end FOR REAL this time.  He is definitely not good enough for the top 4, and it is getting down to the wire!  Stay tuned to see what happens!

DWTS Week 7: Is This The End??

Oh boy, tonight is Latin Night, which means that Sean will be attempting to shake his hips more than ever... Yikes.  Sean was in the bottom 2 last week so he needs to pick it UP!  He is ready for redemption!

Sean is worried that he needs to act like he is in love for the dance, which is hard since he is not in love with PETA, so of course she brings in Catherine for some love inspiration.  This sexuality in the practice room is getting intense!!  If this is what the dancing is like, I wonder what their personal life is like- oh wait, I guess they have to just let it out on the dance floor for now.  Well let's see if he can channel that love to his dance with Peta...

Such love in his eyes!  (ABC)

They are dancing the Rumba tonight, so at least there aren't too many hip-shaking moves (lucky for him...).  Sean is actually pretty good tonight, but still makes kind of uncomfortable awkward faces- like he is angry or thinking or too intense or something.  Oh, but when he smiles at the end, he still looks great of course!  Carrie Ann says the look was "seductive," not sure about that, but of course he looked hot as always.  Bruno is feeling it and dances around smoothly as he critiques Sean, but he does add that sometimes while dancing Sean squats like he is "going to the toilet."  Hmm... not the best thing to say about a dance.  On to the scores...

Brooke asks Sean how it was having Catherine in the room with him practicing this week, and he gushes that her love just inspired him!  How sweet.  After a quick Happy B-Day shout out, Sean gets his scores- 24- and it's looking up!

Now this week- BONUS- we get to see everyone (but one couple) dance again in an intense dance-off!  Love it.  Sean & Peta are going to be doing the Rumba. Again.  They are going up against Ingo & Kym, which I feel is pretty appropriate because they are both at the mid-bottom.  A fight to survive!  Sean looked pretty good this time (his face stayed pretty normal) and I think he was better than Ingo, but it is up to the judges!  Only Bruno votes for Sean & Peta and I am kind of surprised!! Come on, Sean is not THAT bad!  I'm a bit worried for the results this week- even though I think Andy should be next to go, you never know...  Poor Sean might finally lose his time in the spotlight!  So sad.

Stay tuned for the results!

DWTS Week 6: Sean the Future Stripper

This week is Stevie Wonder week on Dancing!  Let's see how Sean handles this one...  As you may remember, last week was Sean's best dance yet, so I hope he can keep this up.  Unfortunately, Sean is doing the Samba this week, which requires a lot of shimmy-ing... NOT his strong suit. We know he has trouble moving his hips and whatnot...  But maybe just maybe he will finally dance shirtless to boost his scores and votes a little bit!  Here's hoping...

Sean and Peta start their dance and it's just... he makes me feel uncomfortable when he moves his body and smiles awkwardly at the camera.  Is it just me?  Because really, it's not natural.  Thank GOD our prayers are answered and he loses his shirt during this dance, FINALLY.  Definitely a smart tactic to get Bruno to give them high scores for a medicore dance.  In fact, the entire second half of the dance we are so distracted by his spray-tanned abs that we aren't even watching his missteps and awkward facial expressions.

When it comes to the judges' feedback, Carrie Ann tells him to get an iPod to work on his musicality, and I agree!  That body is NOT moving with the music and is making us all feel uncomfortable!  Len says it wasn't terrible, but why does he need to take his shirt off?? Why NOT?!  Bruno says not to worry because he can always get a job as a stripper.  WHAT?! Not sure if that was an insult or a compliment, but even Bruno needs to lighten up!  I just can't believe that Sean doesn't even get cheers from BRUNO on his shirtless performance!  Yikes, this is not good.

Sean admits that doing 2 dances was just too overwhelming this week, clearly, and he ends up with straight 7's.  NOT your best, Sean!  We'll see how he does in the team dance challenge later on...

THAT is the face of a future stripper ;)  (ABC)

Luckily, Sean is on the same team as Derek for the team dance.  Thank goodness!  That means he cannot lose.  In case you have never watched this show before, Derek is literally the greatest DWTS pro of all time and I am sure this group dance will be wonderful.  Unfortunately, all the men in this group dance are wearing fake mustaches and they all look like massive pedophiles and I can't handle it.  Sean is actually not the weakest link (Andy Dick, anyone?), but he still just looks so awkward!  Regardless, it was better than the other team's dance (DUH), and they win the dance-off of course. 

We will see what happens to Sean this week- only 8 remain so I am not sure how much longer he will be around... but he HAS to beat out a couple more.  Sorry Andy Dick and Victor Ortiz, you are next.  Stay tuned to see what happens this week and next!

DWTS Week 5: Sean's Best Dance Yet!

This week the couples are dancing side-by-side with a pro couple so we can see how awful/talented they are... can't wait to see how Sean compares!  He and Peta are dancing alongside of Tristan and Chelsie tonight, so this should be interesting.

We see how devastated Sean was last week when he didn't dance his best, so he is ready for redemption!  Does he not realize how many fans he has from the Bachelor???  Nothing to worry about for a few more weeks, at least!  During practices, Sean shows us how he has been mimicking all of Tristan's actions and trying to be just like him, even with wearing the same pink shirt!  How clever and adorable.  Hope he has learned from him!

This week Sean is wearing a full outfit of clothing which is so out of the ordinary! We need to see those arms and abs! But I will tell you what, this was by far his BEST dance yet!  Where did this come from?!?  He actually looked really amazing out there, and the dance made him seem suave and confident.  Crazy!  The judges agree and I still cannot believe it!  Bruno calls him a swan, Len calls him a pigeon (compliment?), and overall it is positive feedback!  He scores a 24 which is his best yet, and things are looking good for Sean!  Stay tuned to see what happens with the results and the coming performance shows!

Sean is starting to kill it!  (ABC)